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Another week has come and gone and little has changed. They are still working on the goddamn bathroom. It now has tile on the floor and most of the walls. They were supposed to come and replace the fixtures so we could have a working bathroom again, but that didn't happen.


Meanwhile, no word from the Cheerful Dutchman about the kitchen. Maybe my bad mood scared them off. "Here's your money back, we won't do the project after all." Or maybe at 8 am tomorrow he'll be here happily pointing out all the terrible things that will happen for the next 4 months.


I am reading The Counterlife again and it reminds me that in Roth's mind, Henry's rant that I quoted a few weeks ago wasn't the end of the story. Henry confides in Nathan again when a heart condition makes him impotent, ending his affairs. This starts a set of parallel story lines that can't help but resonate with me because he is describing my parents' and grandparents' world, and the arguments that they would have, down to the grain of the formica tabletops. The thing about Roth is that his interlocutors always get the best lines; his genius is in having his stand-in be the straight man for others' obsessions. Yes, I am thinking about writing again, why do you ask.


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Some very naive part of me, despite everything, despite a lifetime of profound difference between us, hoped something good would come of this. It wasn't until I had my therapy session today that I started crying. 


***************************


They shook hands in front of the terminal. Nobody watching would ever have imagined that once upon a time they had eaten ten thousand meals together, or that only an hour an earlier they were momentarily as close as they had been back before either had written a book or touched a girl. A plane took off from Newark, roaring in Nathan's ears.


"He did say 'Bastard,' Nathan. He called you a bastard."


"What?"


Suddenly Henry was furiousand weeping. "You are a bastard. A heartless conscienceless bastard. What does loyalty mean to you? What does responsibility mean to you? What does self-denial mean, restraint—anything at all? To you everything is disposable! ... Do you really think that conscience is a Jewish invention from which you are immune? Do you really think you can just go and have a good time with the rest of the swingers without troubling yourself about conscience? Without troubling about anything but seeing how funny you can be about the people who have loved you most in the world? The origin of the universe! When all he was waiting to hear was 'I love you!' 'Dad, I love you'that was all that was required! Oh, you miserable bastard, don't you tell me about fathers and sons! I have a son! I know what it is to love a son, and you don't, you selfish bastard, and you never will!"


— Philip Roth, Zuckerman Unbound

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My father was God and didn’t know it. He gave me
the ten commandments neither in thunder nor in fury, neither in fire nor in cloud
but in gentleness and in love. He added caresses and added kind words
adding, “I beg you,” and “please.” He sang keep and remember
in a single melody and he pleaded and cried quietly between one commandment and the next:
Don’t take your God’s name in vain; don’t take it, not in vain.
I beg you, don’t bear false witness against your neighbor. He hugged me tightly and whispered in my ear:
Don’t steal. Don’t commit adultery. Don’t murder. And he put the palms of his open hands
on my head in the Yom Kippur blessing. Honor, love, in order that your days might be long
on the earth. And my father’s voice was white like the hair on his head.
Later, he turned his face to me one last time
like on the day he died in my arms and said, I want to add
two to the ten commandments:
The eleventh commandment: “Don’t change.”
And the twelfth commandment: “You must surely change.”
So said my father and then he turned from me and went off
disappearing into his strange distances. 


(Yehuda Amichai)



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I am reading this Greil Marcus book Lipstick Traces which is nominally about punk music but actually turns out to be a long explainer of Situationism. Marcus will have many pages about Guy Dubord and the Lettrist International, and then say, "as the Sex Pistols demonstrated..." in the most amazing way. I want to ask Greil Marcus (who is still around) what he makes of the fact that Johnny Rotten turned out to be a horrible Trumpist asshole. 


This is the central paradox of our time, I think — not just that our heroes have turned out to be terrible, but that the last moments in our culture where anything genuinely new occurred — the 1960s and 1970s —  turn out to look, in retrospect, like they paved the way for Reagan and Trump. In fact, of course, there were plenty of people pointing out at the time that these "revolutions" looked a lot like con games.


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Let's try thinking, or at least writing, about anything else.


* It is the new year, so we have to start contemplating the layoff scythe. My boss confided: our group was left off of an org chart for a new project. Of course she saw the org chart because... she was in the meeting for the new project. So she is paranoid and now I have the unease and confusion that comes when you know shit is coming down the pike. Everything I have heard since they told us there would be layoffs seems to argue against us being let go. But you never do know.


* My brother is having some kind of slow-moving nervous breakdown. My sister-in-law called the other night (you know, that night) and said that he can barely move; he is lying on the floor clutching a stuffed animal. He is also heavily drinking again. They are supposed to move to Serbia in a couple of weeks so this is not really great timing.


I don't know. He has never done much of a job letting me into his emotional state, so it is hard to help. He never told me about his trip to rehab and I am not sure if he knows that I know. It was one of those "sure, don't worry about one drink a day" kinds of rehab so it doesn't really surprise anyone that he fell off the wagon. We did a Zoom call on his birthday and he was clearly drinking the whole time. 


I am also sure that part of the problem is paralysis from early retirement. He spent 15 years bitching about his job and then refusing to get another because he'd have to "actually work" (as he put it) and he was so focused on how great it would be to retire early with full benefits. Well, now he's retired, and they literally don't leave the apartment, so all he is doing is sitting there watching the world burn down. Dude has super high blood pressure and, apparently, my mom's anxiety.


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Once upon a time, children, many years ago, the happy people of LiveJournal-land made clever, funny, and intelligent posts, and all the world could collect these finest of pearls. But on one bleak day, LiveJournal-land was invaded by the evil forces of coworkers, colleagues, and (soon to be ex-) wives and husbands. Now LiveJournal-land lies desolate, bereft of the hipster genius that once was.

They say that somewhere deep underground, in a secret world known only by legend as "Friendslock," the most brilliant of posts are still to be found. But only the bravest of souls dare seek them out.
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I suppose there is beauty in clarity, in finally perceiving how things really are. The smiling, nosy cleaning lady at my mom's building just blithely saying to the neighbor across the hall - "those Democrats, they just want to give benefits to illegal aliens, can you believe that?" - yes, the people you thought had some sort of kindliness or affection now show their brain worms to the world openly, smilingly, without shame. Of course the brain worms were always there; only now do we take them seriously, perceive the roiling blackness that covers everything. And by the time we had figured this out, I mean really figured it out, it was already too late.

The irony is that this is a time of the most amazing self-discovery for almost everyone I know. Demons being faced, adventures undertaken, true selves being uncovered. Again. I'm no exception. I will find a way to write about it, soon, but I have a lot of percolating to do.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am always a little bit susceptible to Theories of Everything because, like all Americans, I like a good conspiracy theory. I am a gnostic, or perhaps more kindly, a structuralist: there is an unseen order that determines everything, and the key to understanding is to figure out how it works. On the other hand, the historian's training in me tells me to be skeptical of such things. And I try to balance these competing worldviews.

That said, Jonathan Rodden's book Why Cities Lose gives such an elegant, deeply researched argument that I can't help but feel it unlocks a lot of what is going on now. The title doesn't do justice to the argument, which everyone really needs to take to heart. It's deceptively simple: the organization of Left parties around cities puts them at a perpetual electoral disadvantage in political systems with first-past-the-post, district elections.

There is simply an astonishing mathematical regularity to this. You find it 100 years ago, you find it in every state legislature in the US, and you find it in every country in the world with the same electoral system as ours. It is a product of the inexorable logic of partisan clustering and the fact that the system of electoral districts produces wasted Left votes. In the US, Democratic votes spread out along 19th century railroad lines and depots and decline rapidly once you move away from there. And amazingly, this is fractal: the relationship holds at different levels of voting, from states down to precincts - the more urban -> the more Democratic. Over and over again, and around the world: polarization and minoritarian rule are the corollaries of a geographically based system of governent.

Once you have wrapped your mind around this, a lot of what passes for political argument and debate just sort of melts away. It's not that people don't believe the values they have, it's that they become convinced of things because of the organization of society around them.

Let's take a typical liberal talking point: "it's horrific to put migrant kids in cages." To you and me, that is an undeniable fact so real that someone who denies it lacks decency, empathy, and intelligence. But Trumpsters always have a response: "you don't care about unborn babies [so therefore you don't really care about kids]." Always tu quoque, tu quoque, tu quoque. But instead of being galled by the mindlessness of it, you now can understand what it is: the defensive, instinctive reaction of a tribe of hillbillies trying to maintain their semiotic bubble. In that way, it's a thing of terrible beauty: the capacity of the human mind to deceive itself in the name of what it sees as the greater good. As the SubGenius put it: pull the wool over your own eyes.

The other profound aspect of Rodden's book is appreciating how our electoral system creates cleavages within the Left. This exact same fucking argument about purity vs. pragmatism that we have today has been happening for 100 years, longer in other countries. It is the necessary corollary of the fact that Left voters are concentrated in cities, inefficiently wasting votes, and thus disadvantaged by geographically based electoral systems that promote minority rule. The more that you appeal to and rally the urban faithful, the harder it is to make alliances with the rural yokels who would get you out of the electoral vice. In fact there's an inverse correlation between standing for something and losing elections. And so we have this eternal argument over winning with a watered-down centrism or losing with our principles intact. It is as old as the modern Left itself, it is the same argument everywhere, and it will intensify as minority rule becomes worse and worse.

Rodden points out that the Left in most other countries noticed this in the early 20th century and demanded proportional representation to get out of the vice. In the US, the UK, and Canda the existing Left parties felt like they were doing well enough at the time when these decisions were being made not to have to bother with PR. But politics have changed since then everywhere, as the forces that drive urban economic growth and rural economic loss are accelerating and global. So this turned out to be a losing hand.

When you read this book you become conscious of the awesome divide that exists between us - how it is so deeply rooted and defiant of change. In a certain sense it relieves me. The cleaning lady's beliefs are like any other false consciousness, the product of a system that ruins her mind. But it also makes me aware that what we are up against is much deeper and more profound than Trump or even conservatism. It cannot be defeated; it is the "antithesis" within the dialectic of modernity, the sum of the misery and ressentiment of those who feel they are losing. Our political system, set up before cities really even existed, gives it the power to win elections without votes. It is never going away and it will never lose in a permanent way.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What do you do with this awful knowledge, once you have it? The question of our time.

Everyone knows who Trumpers are; they are pink-faced white people who wear little red hats. It's so absurd and gross, so gaudy and unaware, and yet that's what wins elections, people. I have been thinking about what a counter-consciousness would look like, a self-awareness that strings together all the people in the Left archipelago. It is coming into view, although it is so riven between factions and infighting. In the 19th century there was a term of art among commentators, to refer to the Democratic Party as "the Democracy." I like the simplicity of that, and the way it hearkens to discourse, to a process of creation and becoming. We are all building it together in this terrible time, and we will be very proud of having done so someday - if we survive to tell the tale.

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I feel, as I often do, like I have had a profound insight or "aha!" moment about something. A couple of things, really. So I am in that nice moment of thinking about it, before discovering the 256,245 other people who have thought and written about the same topic with greater depth, thoroughness, and clarity than I ever will, causing me to want to give up on everything in life. Etc.

I am slowly working my way through Battlestar Galactica - the 2004 reboot. I think I decided I needed something to binge that would be fairly mindless but not completely mindless. Some people I know like BSG, and I recently discovered that the mythos is vaguely based on Mormonism. Also, it's free with Prime. ;)

What I keep being struck by in watching this show is how, amidst some very interesting and thought-provoking ideas, it is impossible not to constantly think of how profoundly dated the show's view of technology is. We are only living about 15 years after the show was made, and a bunch of things have already happened that the writers were incapable of imagining. And this makes it very easy to see how silly a lot of the plot contrivances are.

So to a certain extent in order to get to some of the more interesting questions the show poses - how would robot consciousness be like ours? what does humanity mean in an era of AI? - you have to basically buy in to a completely ridiculous set of anachronisms and bizarre juxtapositions. This is a human civilization that has somehow evolved the ability to create both complex AI and interstellar hyperdrives. As is the case in almost every piece of sci fi I have ever seen, the reality of weightlessness in space is simply never referenced at any point. It's just been so solved that we never think about it. And yet they have no communicators, computers look like 1980s Atari graphics, and medicine is still exactly how it is today. In fact, other than the complex AI and warp drives, everything is as it is today. People wear business suits and write and speak in English and "drones" are just decoys.  When people vote in elections for "president" and "vice president" they use paper ballots.

Part of the conceit of the show is that some of the robots now look like people. Now, THANK GOD that they do this, because it means they get to give a lot of show time to the only actors on the show who are any good. But then the writers go further and make them totally indistinguishable from people down to the cellular level. (There is one amusing moment when the doctor delivers a robot baby with difficulty, and is like, "you went to all the trouble of mimicking our evolution, but you couldn't fix the plumbing along the way?" YES YES VERY GOOD FUCKING QUESTION, SHOW! An AI would not do such a thing. It is an absurdity.)

It just goes on and on. Why would you go to the trouble of inventing an entire mythos in which 99% of things are exactly as they are today in early 2000s North America?

This surprises me because the BSG writers came to it from ST:TNG, which, whatever else you might say about it, tried to kind of think through what it all meant. "IF we had transporters AND interstellar travel AND colonization AND had made contact with aliens, THEN here's what the world would look like..." But then I started to think about the fact that most science fiction, even Star Trek, often ends up somehow back where we started. TOS Star Trek kind of had some awareness of the campiness of this, so that when Kirk ends up banging a Native American or shooting at Nazis, you just go, "oh, they the sets left over on the studio lot and the show was out of money."

BSG is interesting in a similar way. In this case, the writers seem to be like, "let's get this space shit out of the way so we can write about what we REALLY want to say," which from the vantage of 2019 looks almost entirely about the Iraq War. The show is so fucking gloomy and heavy; there's no humor (another departure from ST), and yet for first season the show avoided wrestling with its central conceit, which is that humanity was basically destroyed and we are condemned to live in a box for eternity. Again, since the prospect of planetary catastrophe is so much more palpable now than in 2006, it's easy to see that playing a lot of New Age music is not the same thing as actually thinking about what this would mean to people.

I want to make fun of BSG for this, but the truth is that pretty much every work of sci fi that has been popularized has this same tendency - set up the conceit and then dispose of it so we can make people think about the things the writers really want to get into, like nuclear war, racism, nationalism, Rome turning into an empire, what have you. The best thing about the movies on MST3K is that you can see that this is pretty much a universal tendency to the genre. It's the classic reason Rod Serling made the Twilight Zone in the aftermath of the Red Scare. But it's also to say that it's nakedly pedantic in a way that usually becomes tedious after a while. (This gets into some pretty deep waters about how we're primed to believe that aesthetically "good" art is non-political and non-moralizing, but I think I'm not going there today.)

And another thing from the vantage of 2019: it doesn't work. No, people did not understand that Star Wars was a metaphor for the Viet Cong and imperialism. No, people did not appreciate Star Trek telling us how silly it was for people with different colored faces to hate each other. Look around the world we are living in. People do not get the goddamn point. (Of course this could be said for any work of literature, religion, morality, history, philosophy, etc. in Western Civilization. It is really remarkable how people never get the fucking point.) I think this is why someone like Vonnegut couldn't help but satirize the conventions of sci-fi at every turn; they are so flimsy and unconvincing in a deep philosophical sense. The actual future will be incomprehensible to us, but that doesn't make for satisfying story arcs, so we always just somehow find ourselves back in the present.

I am not really saying that BSG is a bad show. Once it leaves off the WWII-combat-movie cliches, it gets into interesting territory, particularly, of all things, in the area of religion. (The Cylons are monotheists and most humans are polytheists, although in another sign of the show's lack of creativity, the gods have all the Greco-Roman names from the zodiac.) Similarly, it gropes toward exploring why a robot AI would be so petulant and moody when it comes to humans. (The prequel Caprica, which I saw when it came out, did a much better job with all of this.)

Anyway. I know some of you all have thoughts about this and I am curious as to what you think, because you are among the people who have thought more about this than I have, for sure.

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For some reason, Chrome stopped working for me. I can do "incognito" windows and it's fine, but regular Chrome times out trying to anything. This wouldn't be a problem except that in "incognito" mode, it pretends you are a brand new person every time, so you have to log in to everything. And the auto-fill passwords I had for LJ were wrong. And it would lock me out of LJ for trying them. So I haven't read LJ in a few weeks. Now I see that you can only go like 20 friends' posts back. Argh.

Anyway, nothing much has happened and everything is fine. I sure do have research stuff to write about, though. So that's good news for another time.
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My aunt finally passed late last night.

My aunt had the strongest New York accent of anyone I've ever known. She was sharp and funny and full of life to the end. We should have known she would last longer than anyone expected, so much so that part of me thought somehow she could beat this, regardless of what the doctors said.

Did you know bereavement fares don't exist anymore? I didn't. I had expected to go out there when this was supposed to be imminent last month. It's $1000 to get out there. Also, I'm still kind of destroyed from last week.

I have to call my mom. She and Rhoda were very close in the years since my dad and Jess died, talking frequently. She'll be heartbroken.

She is still miserable and furious at being in the health center and extremely bitter. She says the aide to take her to the doctor on Wednesday never showed up. Wtf?
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**I concocted all of the below before discovering that this book already exists: https://www.amazon.com/Assholes-Theory-Donald-Aaron-James/dp/0385542038/ref=asap_bc?ie=UTF8. So I'm not especially clever, but in the hopes that my slow meanderings are of interest to all of you. Also, it's 4 am.

When I consider the DT phenomenon in its broadest historical terms, I think it's really about Asshole-ism. If I can use such a term. Bear with me.

What does it mean to be an Asshole? At its existential core, the Asshole is a person who cuts you off when driving, or rounds a curve without thinking that people might be there, or blasts music from his car late at night. The Asshole is recklessly, almost deliberately thoughtless. Assholes are not exactly evil - they aren't necessarily out to cause pain - but they're indifferent to the possibility that they might do so. In fact, they are contemptuous of the need to recognize that this might happen. Being an Asshole, then is the opposite of being empathetic - not only do you not feel someone's pain, you spitefully reject the need to recognize the other at all.

What's interesting about most stories of Asshole-ishness that you and I might exchange with each other is that they're premised on the opacity or anonymity of the person being an Asshole, who becomes a kind of idealized notion of indifference. "This asshole crossed three lanes of traffic to make that left turn," you might say. What kind of selfish Asshole would do that? If, according to the French maxim, to understand is to forgive, then Assholes are usually, almost by definition, people who don't explain themselves to us and who we cannot forgive.

Usually, but not always. I remember, many years ago, encountering in an online discussion group, the brother of an ex-girlfriend of mine. He was defending these Assholes who drive around in pickup trucks, blaring nationalist slogans and waving Israeli flags in East Jerusalem just to piss off Arabs. Kind of the Platonic ideal of Assholes.

I was shocked that this scrawny kid I once knew had become a some kind of wacky Kahanist jerk. I don't remember what I emailed him, but I do remember his response: "Yeah yeah yeah."

That's it. That's the core of being an Asshole - that "yeah yeah yeah." Not just a dismissal of moral objections, but a kind of defiance of them. It perfectly expresses an attitude in which you and your petty morality are just meaningless. But it's more than that. It's an implicit acknowledgment of guilt, while also, in the utterance, sweeping it away with one's hand.

Conversely, "Don't be an Asshole" is kind of the whole point of pretty much every work of art, philosophy, or religion that you've ever read. This isn't the "banality of evil" - being an Asshole is an act of rebellion against the moral impulses that you learn as a child.

Another interesting part of Assholish-ness, also, is that we've probably all had the experience of being Assholes ourselves. I remember vividly once honking at cars apparently charging through an intersection, until belatedly realizing that they were part of a funeral. Or we say something thoughtless that we then regret. I thought they were the Asshole, but really I'm the Asshole, is probably something that good people have experienced. Then there are the grey areas in which our own intentions are muddled by confusion or ignorance, maybe with a dash or two of indignant anger or snap judgment. All ways in which we dimly acknowledge that our view of ourselves as good and not Assholes is insufficient.

***************************************************

What does this have to do with Trump? I think the thing that reveals itself, when you engage with his supporters, or read what they write, is how strikingly they adopt the language of Assholes. Now, by saying that, I kind of wish there was a way to say it that didn't sound pejorative, because I'm trying to be precise, not judgmental. I'm not saying that these people are amoral scum. In fact, they clearly have moral and rational arguments for their positions, no matter how much I disagree with them. But I'm saying that they embody the ethos and attitude of "yeah yeah yeah" as applied to politics.

I've never yet encountered defenders of DT, in person or online, who don't seem, on one level, profoundly stupid. That is, they make incoherent arguments that evade the issue at hand and bring up a mishmash of other hatreds that they feel that somehow excuse whatever DT is doing (like a few weeks ago, when my dentist spontaneously told me, "I've never hated the media as much as I do right now."). This is because their beliefs about DT are conditioned by their pre-existing hyperpartisanship. And, to be fair, my views of DT are conditioned by my own - that's the world we live in.

But what interests me is that Trump supporters do have a language at hand to deal with your accusations of racism, misogyny, collusion with Russia, and so on. It's what in rhetorical terms is called "Tu Quoque" - "you're just a hypocrite." A letter writer to the local newspaper says (paraphrasing): "All these liberals with these 'we have no hate here' lawn signs just ignore how much hate they really have." If you say that they are poisoning our lives with partisan hatreds, they point to Kathy Griffin or something similar and say, "you started it." Actually, there are countless Tweets by DT himself that show this mindset in its purest form.

I don't think it's any great insight on my part to say that this American partisan blindness is the reason why DT is impervious to scandal or other things that we used to think would bring down corrupt political leaders. But Asshole-ism as a political ideology, the defense of dreadful acts on the basis of muddled reasoning and "ends-justify-the-means" thinking, is something that we can probably understand more broadly and historically. It's the same mental phenomenon behind why people join ISIS or why they beat civil rights protesters in the 1960s; it's how many people in larger society endorse or tolerate evil acts while not considering themselves to be evil. We might call it "fascism" because this kind of nihilistic amorality characterized the nazi regime. But in reality it's the key element of all forms of social oppression, regardless of ideology.

I don't love an argument that says that to defeat DT we need to defeat Asshole-ism. Assholes are everywhere, mysteriously ruining our lives with their indifference, and historically, they're as old as time itself. So it stands to reason that there will always be movements that seek to express Assholishness in political form: to say that we must be impervious to shame in order to do what needs to be done. But it doesn't seem inevitable to me that they have to win, because, you know, at the end of the day - they're Assholes. In most times and places, people have a low ongoing tolerance for Assholes. And that includes in politics.

Despite what this might imply, I don't think the answer is to say to DT supporters, "you people are being such assholes!" The whole point of being an Asshole is that they don't care. They feel guilt; they just squelch it. The key, then, must be to defeat the logic behind squelching that impulse to recognize the difference between good and bad. Creating alternate social visions must be part of it, and increasing social contacts with people we disagree with has to be part of it too. Because you won't be an Asshole if you know who you're hurting - that's what it seems like to me.
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Welcome back, everyone! Some of us never quite left.
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I delivered this at my minyan at Germantown Jewish Centre yesterday. I worked on it pretty hard and I think I more or less like it, although (as always) while I'm giving it I'm thinking, "this is so vapid and obvious." But because it represents (concisely!) what I've been able to absorb of Laclau after studying him for so long, I thought it might be worth jotting down here.

*************************************

I wanted to acknowledge that this is a relatively scholastic dvar, which may not be the biggest need people have this time of year. With such a high level of anxiety and tension over the election, I almost feel I should be offering therapy instead. But everyone has their own way of dealing with anxiety, and deep contemplation and study is mine, and I feel that the results of this do speak to this moment in time, as I’ll explain in a minute.

A recurring theme of these opening chapters of Genesis is a set of recurring motifs – of unity, on the one hand, and division or multiplicity on the other. In the days of creation, for example, God divides the universe into progressively specialized realms – darkness from light, water from dry land and so on. In this week’s parasha, we have the unity of humanity, represented by Noach’s family, being progressively divided and scattered into different realms. And just as in the creation story of Genesis, this actually is recounted two times, in two different ways. First we read in Chapter 10 that Noach’s sons are scattered, each with its own language. Then we read in chapter 11 that God, confronted by the city of Babel, confounded human speech and scattered people around the earth.

This seems timely to me at this political season because this progression from primeval unity to complexity is one that, I think, is a deep part of both the religious and the political imagination. In a diverse, democratic world, how do we define our larger goals for humanity? As Jews we look forward in our liturgy to a day when “the Lord shall be one and his Name one”- to accomplish an ideological and linguistic unity of understanding – that is what the messianic age is meant to represent. And in the political realm, as citizens of a democracy, we look ahead to a world where justice, truth, compassion, and freedom are felt by all. And yet here we have a text that suggests, rather subversively, that such a human unity has been frustrated directly by God – that multiplicity, diversity, and confusion are part of the divinely mandated order of this world. How can this be so?

I recently came across an interesting argument by the late post-Marxist philosopher Ernesto Laclau that I find very suggestive in thinking about this paradox. Laclau is a theorist of political language, and I’m neither a philosopher nor a linguist, so I find his arguments very difficult to follow. But in his last book, Laclau illustrated one of his ideas by exploring a spiritual text that is actually part of the high holiday liturgy – the piyyut Ha’aderet veha-emunah – and is also often recited, as we do, on Simchat Torah. It’s also part of the daily liturgy of the Sephardim.

This is from a first-millennium mystical text known as the “Hekhalot Rabbati.” According to Gershom Scholem, these hymns were used for concentration and meditation on the nature of the divine, to allow the mystic to become closer to the divine presence. This poem represents the “song of the angels” near the center or destination of that mystical journey. You can see that the poem lists different qualities or attributes belong to God. Power and faith, understanding and blessing, greatness and pride, knowledge and speech, purity and order, and so on – all to “the one who gives life to the world.” Scholem, from whom Laclau found this text, notes that there is a kind of vacuous, litany-like quality to this list – we don’t really learn anything in particular about God in it. It’s part of the liturgy because it works on the emotional level, as a way for a believer to find many “ladders” or personal connections to the divine.

Now, we see how this poem represents an old problem in the monotheistic imagination that we wrestle with at many points in Jewish liturgy. How can we use words to express a knowledge of the Divine, which by definition is beyond all expression? When we talk of God reigning as a king, the act of our thinking of a human king with a robe and scepter etc. is entirely inadequate, perhaps even bordering on blasphemous – but our words and imagination are all that we have as human beings. We only have words to give expression to the inexpressible.

Laclau notices that the mystic’s way of approaching this problem is to acknowledge all of the multiplicity – all of the things that are particular to us as humans, and that we do know, and to make them equivalent to one another in this sense. The mystic creates “horizontal” chains of equivalence between them. Before God, power and faith, understanding and blessing, and so on – all are the same, all are in that sense only, interchangeable with one another. They are both entirely “full” of meaning (because they are attributes of God) and “empty” (because they are all inadequate expressions of God).

What is interesting about this from Laclau’s point of view is that there is a similarity to what we do with such terms that are in the political realm. I mentioned at the outset that terms such as truth, justice, freedom are universal and positive to us. If we see protesters holding signs demanding truth and justice, without even knowing the content of what they want, those terms resonate with us. Some political philosophers have used this phenomenon to posit the idea of an underlying, universal morality.

But to Laclau, terms such as these “empty signifiers” are only really effective to us once we have given them a particular content. The analogy with mystical thinking is clear – the process of pushing terms toward the universal leaches them of their particularity. As humans, a term such as “freedom” means something specific to each of us – for those protesters, perhaps “freedom of the press from persecution by the state” – that is, a particular time and place.

To Laclau, the process of politics is about different actors creating chains of rhetorical equivalence between these universal terms, and the particular concerns of different times and places. Progressives create a claim that “justice” means “universal health care.” The goal of politics is to create (or disrupt) a chain of horizontal equivalences between particular grievances and these universal terms, so that “defending the Republic” means supporting this candidate or policy.

One conclusion of this is that the process of making these equivalences is not and never can be complete. This tension between the particular and the universal is baked in to how we speak and thus how we perceive the world. It also means that there can never be a moment in which all of America is either liberal or conservative, Republican or Democratic. That is, the logic of contingent alliances and attempts to make different chains of equivalence cannot ever truly end. George Bernard Shaw’s famous comment on linguistics was that England and America are divided by a common language. In the ultimate sense, this is what this means for politics as well –terms that unite are terms that divide.

The linguistic paradox between unity and multiplicity, then, is baked into both the political and the spiritual realms. What’s interesting about the Babel story is its suggestion that this paradox of multiplicity is part of the divinely mandated order of the world. No matter how eloquent we are or how reasonable we seem to be, there will always be alternate ways to create these chains of equivalence because the unity they are reaching toward is both accessible to everyone, and in this sense, meaningless.

Does this seem nihilistic or hopeless? I don’t think so. It doesn’t say that change for the better is impossible. What it says is that this kind of change is not inevitable – that there’s nothing in the way that the world is constructed that naturally leads to better outcomes. It’s accomplished, not through inexorable progress, but through human action, through struggle, in every generation, again and again. This year has revealed some stark truths about our nation that will still exist on Wednesday, regardless of the outcome on Tuesday. The work ahead is more urgently needed than ever – and we are the ones who must act.
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I have plans again, which is a good sign. And you're part of them, LJ. Just letting you know.
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I have some kind of internal mechanism that keeps me going regardless. If I let myself think about it, I stew, I get angry, and I vent. I hatch schemes of revenge.

But some part of me doesn't let that take over too much of the time, or least as much as I write about it here. I exercise, I read, I do the things I need to do to keep myself sane. I find things to enjoy in life, by and large. I try not to think about it, and mostly, I succeed. I don't know if that's just how I'm wired or if I have really good coping mechanisms.

And let me be clear, amidst all the complaining, that the situation we're in is enviable: we're making more money right now than we ever thought we would, we're utterly secure in our jobs, and the kids are doing better than ever. We "made it." Those of you who have been reading for a long time know how absolutely unlikely that outcome seemed 5 years ago.

And yet... E is working day and night every single day practically nonstop. I feel enraged and humiliated. Neither of us can do the creative and imaginative things that we dreamed of doing. A good day is one when nothing horrible happens and we can watch some TV together at the end of the night.

This kind of life is not what we had in mind.

I keep wondering. How did it come to this? And does it really have to be this way? The answers are very much evident, but it's a kind of Rubik's cube that you can't resist playing with all the time.
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Posted to [livejournal.com profile] abandonedplaces

Found on my Thanksgiving walk/drive: neat little bricked-up Victorian oddity near the Cynwyd Trail in Lower Merion. I'm guessing this is the original cemetery chapel, since it is just up a short road from a train depot. Did not have the guts to squeeze through the one window knocked open, but glimpsed the arches inside.

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Am I the only one for whom it's almost impossible to get the page to post a new entry? This place is getting annoying.
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With the hazy idea of getting out of my career rut by writing Something about what I know (history and education) I started reading Keith Jenkins' Re-thinking History at bedtime. It's a short read, but provocative. The argument is that really historians are not trying to (a la Collingwood) reconstruct mind, but to evaluate traces of the past; the mind is unknowable. All we really do in history, fundamentally, is compare traces and make arguments from intertextual comparison. That screws with a lot of other assumptions about thinking historically and the research basis for what I've been doing these past 10 years... but when I think about it, I think he's really right on a fundamental level. So it's making me think I need to reevaluate a lot of what I think I know and think it through. I'm starting to feel that way more generally about life as well.

Look, shiny!

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So I was in New York for the staff retreat, at the godforsaken Hudson Hotel, and I woke up early on Thursday thinking I should really find a place to say kaddish for my dad. (You're supposed to find a prayer service for this every day for a year after the death.) But the options, without prior planning, were not great: all the Conservative synagogues are either far uptown or on the East Side, and I don't think I can go to them and get back in time for the start of the meeting. Shearith Israel, which is old-school Sephardic, is not far, but the Sephardic version of the mourner's kaddish has weird extra phrases and stuff and I don't want to fumble with it in front of everyone. Lincoln Square, which is "modern Orthodox," is pretty close by, and at 7. Hm, well, I used to daven with a modern Orthodox minyan in grad school, so I guess I can hack it.

Thing is, I brought my tfillin, but not a kippah (beanie). I've never been in a synagogue that didn't have a basket of beanies by the door, though, right? How bad can it be? And I am feeling pretty guilty about the idea of not saying kaddish. So I walk in with my hood on (it was really cold) and this guy on the elevator chated with me a little bit.

Get to the room, look inside... many Very Orthodox Looking guys getting ready to daven... no basket of beanies. No beanies in the lobby or anywhere. Because... they're Orthodox. They all have their own beanies. Guy I come up with on the elevator sees me looking confused and asks what's wrong, and I tell him. He starts yelling. "HEY, ANYONE HAVE A SPARE YARMULKE? ANYONE? SOMEONE HAS TO HAVE A SPARE YARMULKE! THERE'S GOT TO BE A YARMULKE SOMEWHERE IN THE BUILDING!" After flashing back to the movie Bananas I die right on the spot and my body leeches into the carpeting somewhere until finally, some guy comes over and gives me a spare.

There was some other hilarity too, like they wanted me to tie the Torah and I demurred, so they had me take it out of the Ark, or as the guy who asked me quietly added, "the easiest thing there is to do." Yes, hi everyone, the Very Obviously Not Orthodox guy has come to your town.

I beat it out of there pretty quick and I am now extra-grateful for my Conservative shul. I mean, I'm not saying they did anything wrong. They are who they are and I should have known better. And I will know better next time than to go out of my comfort zone. This is about me and being embarrassed. Although, good grief, that guy.

Also, you know who would really get a chuckle out of that story? My dad. Yeah.
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Once upon a time, children, LiveJournal-land was among the fairest of realms, abounding in posts of great wit, humor, and insight, and all the world came to gather its finest of pearls. Alas, one dark day the land was invaded by the hordes of bosses, co-workers, and (soon to be ex-) wives and husbands. Now LiveJournal-land lies desolate, bereft of the posts that once made its name.

The legends tell of a world deep underground, known by rumor only as "Friendslocked," where the posts still frolic and gambol as in days of old. Yet only the truly brave dare seek entry...
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