a Christian Scientist with appendicitis

[sanpaku_backup]

I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
I learn by learning where I have to go.
-Theodore Roethke, "The Waking"

It's funny when literal-minded historians try reading poetry. Understanding the meta in poetry has always been hard for me. So it's like, hard work.

Anyway, something about the poem appeals to me -- I keep turning it over again and again. Something about how discovering death is what makes you alive... but not very much. Which seems about right these days.

Basically, it's very, very bad. I promised not to describe the badness here anymore because I can't really do it fairly, can't really do justice to the whole picture. And as tedious as it is to read it, it's even more tedious to write about it all the time. And also, there's no point in posting anything because there's really no advice anyone can give or insight that can be offered into the situation. The misery and its causes are perfectly diagnosed and intimately understood, and all the excellent remedies you would prescribe turn out to involve killing the disease by killing the patient. Throw up your hands at me in frustration and disgust and walk away. I sure wish I could.

Comments

[cellio]

Damn, I'm sorry. I wish there was something useful I could say.

[sanpaku.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

[msmidge.livejournal.com]

You sound hopeless (for yourself, not you as a person). No one here is throwing up their hands in disgust.

[sanpaku.livejournal.com]

Thanks. And hey, I was glad to hear that you are able to do something good about your sitch.

[flw.livejournal.com]

How many times have I told you to start smoking pot?

[sanpaku.livejournal.com]

It's funny, I talked to Jean last night and she told me the exact same thing. No joke.

[flw.livejournal.com]

Do you have a shed?

[sanpaku.livejournal.com]

Yes, indeed I do. But the kids play there, mind you.

[flw.livejournal.com]

Perfect! If you're going to do this, do it right!

[librarygrrl.livejournal.com]

that probably would not hurt.

Seriously.


I mean, toddler bedtime is about 12 minutes away and then what do you think I will be doing?

For reals.

[flw.livejournal.com]

Studies show that parents who put off getting stoned until their toddlers are more or less asleep... I forget...

[librarygrrl.livejournal.com]

more asleep is better.

[flw.livejournal.com]

I learned it by watching YOU!

[librarygrrl.livejournal.com]

christ, bobby, quit being such a pussy!

[flw.livejournal.com]

Darn! I don't know this reference.